All About Me, Part III

Me, very young.

Ok, final set of 12! Overall I would say these were the most difficult to answer. In fact, a few of them required some honest soul-searching before I could come up with the right words. I am so glad I was able to do this in my own time, instead of in person with lots of pressure to answer things right away.

  1. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling … “

Ok, all my readers are my partner for this one. You can make your own “we” statements in the comments (and that would be awesome!).

We are all reading this blog right now.
We care about autism, mental illness, or disability enough to read or write about it.
We are mammals.

  1. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share … “

I wish I had someone with whom I could share crafting knowledge. I could teach what I know, and they would teach what they know, and we would both come out with more crafting power!

Actually, I kinda already do, but more would always be nice.

  1. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.

Much of this is on my blog already, but here goes. Anyone who is going to be a close friend of mine should know any number of things about me:

I struggle with depression and anxiety, and am much better with them medicated.
I always have cat hair on me. ALWAYS.
I am on the autism spectrum.
I am pagan.
I am androgynous.

  1. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.

This is a tough one. My “partner” in this is all of you, and we’re not actually interacting as I’m writing this. Though really, how would you do this with a stranger, either? I guess you could reference the answers they gave to the various previous questions.

  1. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.

Just for the record, I am really glad I am writing these ahead of time instead of trying to answer them with a partner right on the spur of the moment. I do my best to forget my embarrassing moments, it’s not super easy to deliberately remember one.

Going with my usual thing of answering conceptually rather than specifically – I am very clumsy. *Very* clumsy. I am forever damaging myself by walking into walls, clunking my arms, legs, elbows, toes, hands, etc into anything that happens to be around.

I recently had a fairly embarrassing injury that involved walking into a wall (I was trying to go through a door, but I missed) while I was rubbing my hand through my hair, and my elbow went BANG! It took over a week before I could do things without pain again. All because I missed a doorway.

  1. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?

I last cried by myself the night Genzi died. I was alone in my room, with only my thoughts and feelings to accompany me and nothing to occupy myself with. I cried for nearly an hour, getting my pillow all wet.

I recently cried in front of another person one night, when I was feeling the loss of a previous connection particularly acutely.

  1. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.

Wait, wasn’t this question 28? What’s going on?!

  1. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?

Rape. Ok, this is a little bit tricky (but not really). It’s ok to make jokes intending to laugh at rape culture, or the way people defend rapists or blame victims, and things like that. It is never ok for rape to be the punchline of a joke, or for rape to be treated like something funny.

The same can be said for any number of other things. You can joke about the surrounding culture, but don’t act like the thing itself is funny. Because it isn’t.

  1. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?

I’ve been thinking about this for days and I’m having trouble coming up with much. I don’t have any secret loves that I have yet to confess or anything like that.

Part of me thinks I might regret not telling my dad about how I was in the hospital last year. He believes that poor people should not have/do not need health insurance, and when I – a poor person who lacks health insurance – wound up in the hospital, I just could not deal with him anymore. Especially given the financial aftermath involved and how utterly awful that was – I just cannot get past his politics of “no, let’s totally NOT insure all Americans” nor can I just “agree to disagree” because my own life and health are at stake here. I don’t tell him because I know it would wind up being more about my own anger and feelings of betrayal than any sort of reconciling, and I just can’t imagine any good coming from it. I don’t think he’ll change his mind, I am entirely uninterested in being the special exception among poor Americans, I am certainly not going to change *my* mind, and I’m pretty sure I would just end up even more hurt and angry than I already am. But if I died, and were capable of feeling regret after death, it’s possible I might regret not trying. I’m not sure.

  1. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?

Hmm. My important documents are in a fire-proof safe, so I guess I won’t worry about those. We’ll say that my wallet is on me at the time, so I won’t worry about that either. In which case, I think that I would save my computer. It is hugely important in my life, is one of my primary vectors for communicating with the world at large, and contains many pictures and other things that I would not want to use. My back-ups are also in the house, so they would get burned up too, so it’s definitely worth saving the computer.

  1. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?

My mom or my brother. Both are people I’ve been slowly reconnecting with, mostly via phone calls which is not the best way for me to do things like that. They are both very far away from me which further complicates matters. I would be really sad that we never really managed to be closer.

  1. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.

Ok.  A personal problem that is not completely private that I am open to advice on. This is a toughie. Let me think about this…

Actually, I’ve been talking a lot in this series of posts about my crummy relationship with my dad. Now, there is a lot more backstory involved than I’ve gotten into, but I am quite interested in outside perspective and “what would you do” feedback specifically about the hospitalization and insurance thing that lead to my refusing to speak to him anymore.

And there you have it. All 36 questions, so hopefully now you know (and like?) me better than you did before. Once again, I would super love it if you answered any of these yourself. Or even left your own problem that you would like my, or other commenters, perspective on.

Part I

Part II

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3 Comments

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3 responses to “All About Me, Part III

  1. Pingback: All About Me, Part II | Aspergers and Me

  2. Pingback: All About Me, Part 1 | Aspergers and Me

  3. Bo Olympiadis

    That was interesting.